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go FUCK YOURSELF San Diego
♞ "Are you going to Scarborough Fair? Parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme. Remember me to one who lives there, she once was a true love of mine."

I'm Bob, a neurotic, stoned, musician from SoCal with little to no self-esteem or control.


Let's get funky.



hostilehottie:

celestia:

remember

if you can watch this entire video straight through you have the most iron fucking will on the actual planet, in the actual universe. you have gigantic balls of steel. i would not fuck with you. you could come in my house and slap my mom and take my cats and i would just let you. if you can watch all of this you scare the shit out of me

GOLDEN DIAMONDS

(via diamondplatypus)

gerardsthumblr:

The akinator game needs to slow the fuck down

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(via diamondplatypus)

diablosita:

The Best Birth Control In The World Is For Men by Jon Clinkenbeard
If I were going to describe the perfect contraceptive, it would go something like this: no babies, no latex, no daily pill to remember, no hormones to interfere with mood or sex drive, no negative health effects whatsoever, and 100 percent effectiveness. The funny thing is, something like that currently exists.
The procedure called RISUG in India (reversible inhibition of sperm under guidance) takes about 15 minutes with a doctor, is effective after about three days, and lasts for 10 or more years…
Oh, and when you do decide you want those babies, it only takes one other injection of water and baking soda to flush out the gel, and within two to three months, you’ve got all your healthy sperm again.
The trouble is, most people don’t even know this exists. And if men only need one super-cheap shot every 10 years or more, that’s not something that gets big pharmaceutical companies all fired up, because they’ll make zero money on it (even if it might have the side benefit of, you know, destroying HIV).

scarecrowinc93:

garymanderrr:

chapmen:

literally wtf the fuck

i love how the balloon one is just like ????

what kind of black magic is this family

(via diamondplatypus)

tupacabra:

prettygirlfrommichigan:

tupacabra:

name one fragrance commercial that has ever made sense

wat are u talking about they all make scents

shut the fuck up

I’d bet a pretty penny they all make cents

(via diamondplatypus)

spooky-snowflake-hall-of-doom:

theporygontrail:

remember when nickelodeon picked the worst possible name for their halloween sweepstakes

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(via ruinedchildhood)